you too can be unpopular

Among my earliest memories are times at church with my mother and sister, and in particular I remember quite a number of Bible verses that I memorized. (Cool--I must have really memorized them!) Among countless gifts from God is a pretty good memory, and one of the verses I remember is Proverbs 27:6. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.

I must confess that most of the times in my life that I have meditated on this verse, it has been from the standpoint of the recipient of the wounds or kisses, as the case may be. Recently, however, the tables have turned and my thoughts have tended to my choice of giving the wounds or kisses. On a number of occasions that I can think of, I'm afraid that my dealings with people in my life have been more on the order of deceitful kisses than faithful wounds. The interactions that I am thinking about were not overt deceitfulness but subtle complacency--at their core, just plain selfishness.

What has brought this line of thinking about is not the verse in Proverbs but another passage of scripture. I have mentioned in the past (several times, I believe) that I breakfast with a close-knit group of men on Thursdays for Bible study, fellowship, support and accountability. Several weeks ago, we began reading the book of Galatians together. Early on, Galatians 1:10 leaped out at me.

For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ.

The last sentence in particular seized my attention, for the apostle Paul seems to set in direct opposition the pleasing of people with serving the Lord. I think that most of us try to please people around us, especially those that we call friends. We like to see those people closest to us happy. But Paul teaches, in essence, "I can either please people or be a servant of Christ."

The error (seeking to please people) is very subtle and is easy to wrap in a veneer of "Christian virtue." But Jesus' command is "Love one another, as I have loved you." As C. S. Lewis said,

Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained.

Viewing this through the lens of Proverbs 27:6, sometimes the choice is whether to love or please someone. Looking back, I think that sometimes my motivation to "please" a person was fear of being hurt myself. However, Jesus loves me perfectly and will not leave me, so the step of faith is to love people with his love, seeking the loved person's good even if it hurts.

We certainly don't want to set out to wound a friend, but choosing to do what is in a person's best interests may be painful. It may be easier to do what seems to please everyone, but how often do we recognize, let alone believe, that the more popular path consists of the actions of an enemy rather than a friend?

grand funk (with apologies to rockers everywhere)

It seems that quite a few people in my life are particularly burdened these days. It seems more and more common to hear a comment like, "I've been in a funk lately." If you're hoping for something profound from me about this... Sorry! But you know me and my quotes, and as I [this morning] encountered even more who seemed listless and fatigued in so many ways, several quotes and the associated rabbit trails of thought came to mind.

First and foremost, I identify. I've had some particular struggles for a while now; I know and understand some of the things that have brought on these struggles in me, but there are other feelings I have but don't really know why. As a result, when I read scripture it seems dry and vague; when I pray I think that I sense distance between me and God. When I figuratively stand aside and look at me, it kind of sticks out that my relationship with God is under assault! This just serves to illustrate why it is so crucial to base my relationship with him on the truth of the word rather than my experience. I must continually remind myself of this; even when my experience might suggest otherwise, the truth from his word is that his love for me is never-ending and never fails. His wisdom in guiding my life is implicitly perfect and trustworthy. His power and faithfulness to deliver on what he has promised cannot be thwarted or denied. On these bases, I read and I pray; this morning I thought about the great expositor Matthew Henry, who said

When I can not enjoy the faith of assurance, I live by the faith of adherence.

At my church, we have taught for many years that feelings and emotions are not trustworthy to base decisions and life choices on. I think that some heard that feelings and emotions are bad, but this is not what was intended. Rather, my life, my walk with God, is based on the truth of the word, and so I walk on, regardless of how I feel.

Abraham Lincoln said,

To ease another's heartache is to forget one's own.

This verbalizes the other thought I had: What an opportunity to serve when I encounter someone who is struggling! And while I might ultimately desire to help someone let go of a burden, my best service is not necessarily to preach or give answers but to laugh with, cry with, live with, love on my neighbor! Jesus is the great physician; I by his power want to render service that is useful in lifting that funk. Consistent with Lincoln's comment, I see in me the forgetting of struggles when God opens opportunities to serve and I focus on the needs of others. So often the best service is genuineness and open, willing fellowship.

In my own case, I'm amazed at how God has repeatedly, in the midst of simple fellowship with his people, revealed Himself to be the solution to the "struggle of the day." Most frequently that has taken the form of something being said that takes my mind back to specifics in the scriptures. All the while I thought I was serving the other person!

If you're feeling burdened, strugglilng, in a funk, take heart; walk on in your relationship with God, no matter how it "feels." Love on the people God has placed in your life, and don't be surprised when he uses your service to bless you.

bragging on God

Tomorrow my daughter leaves on a short-term mission trip to Russia. This will be her second trip there, and to say that I am very proud of her would be understatement. However, I am always mindful that she is the fabulous young lady that she is because of God and the way He has gifted her. Now thereby hangs a tale.

This morning as I sat eating breakfast, she came in and sat down with me. During the course of our conversation she mentioned that she needed to come up with a devotional for the [Russia] team. You see, the team does a devotional together each day during the trip, and each team member leads at least one of those sessions. Predictably, I began thinking of what I might do if the assignment was mine. After a moment, my mind went to Psalm 34:1-3:

I will bless the LORD at all times;
His praise shall continually be in my mouth.

My soul will make its boast in the LORD;
The humble will hear it and rejoice.

O magnify the LORD with me,
And let us exalt His name together.

I talked to her about verse 3 in particular, where in the New American Standard Bible it is rendered "O magnify the Lord with me." (In the New International Version, is says, "Glorify the Lord...") What does it mean to "magnify the Lord?" Make God bigger? When one looks at the moon through a telescope, the moon doesn't get bigger--we see it bigger. And I think that's what the psalmist meant--glorify the Lord, see Him bigger, as big as he truly is. Too often we look at God through the eyes of our own understanding, and so we'll always see him too small. Let me mention a quote here that I've mentioned before:

If God were small enough to be understood, He would not be big enough to be worshiped.

—Evelyn Underhill

But verse 2 was the nugget for me this morning; the psalmist said, "My soul will make its boast in the Lord." I'm proud of both of my kids, but they're God's kids first, and they are fine people not because of me but because of the way he made and gifted them. Praise Him!

from another father to one

You may or may not have been aware that I have a son who has been serving with the Army in Iraq. Upon discovering this, many would ask me how I was doing, whether or not I worried, was I stressed, etc.

I would respond that the fact of my son choosing to be in harm's way (and he did choose it) changed nothing for me; I have long been comfortable with the fact that protection for my loved ones can only come from God and not from any effort (or worry) of mine. The dangers my son faces may seem more imminent, but witness the tragic events that can occur "at home," such as the Virginia Tech shootings a year ago. What, or better, where is safe?

It would be a lie to say I did not worry, but my faith in Jesus Christ and trust in God's sovereignty have allowed me to be at peace with the circumstances of life, even if and when I don't understand the events that occur. Even if tragedy struck, I would want my response to be to praise and thank God for his grace and love.

Benjamin B. Warfield said,

A firm faith in the universal providence of God is the solution of all earthly troubles.

Some might hear that and say, "Well, you don't understand my problems!" or "You'd be saying something different if..." Warfield understood; his wife was paralyzed soon after their marriage. Even so, he cared for her throughout their 39 years of marriage, and he remained a yielded, faithful servant of God. Read about him here.

Today, I praise and thank God for protecting my son, who I spoke with last night. He is back in this country, this tour of duty coming to an end, and he should be home this weekend. So, from just another human father to the one Father of all, who loves me as if there were no other, so much that he didn't spare his own son, and indeed he loves all with that same boundless love, praise and glory to you, Lord.

not "all alone"

The Bible knows nothing of solitary religion.

—John Wesley

Satan watches for those vessels that sail without convoy.

—George Swinnock

When my wife and I first joined our church (over 18 years ago--wow, where has the time gone?) there was a large red banner across the back of the auditorium. The banner, in large white lettering, proclaimed Romans 12:5: So we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another. I can still remember my disappointment when the banner was taken down. Recently I began to ponder this verse anew as the latest teaching series at church is a "One Another" series.

The Greek word translated as "one of another" is allēlōn, and I have always been amused that while the English pronunciation sounds somewhat like "all alone," the usage in context points in the opposite direction. Romans 12:5 speaks to our mutual need for each other in the body of Christ; each of us has a unique function within the body according to how God has made, has gifted, us. I'm afraid that some can read this and think something like, "Oh, my church job description!" This at best is an impersonal view of something intended to be very personal; we learn in Ephesians 4:16 that building each other, and ultimately the body, up in love is the goal.

But I have always thought of the banner, hence Romans 12:5, in terms of navigating daily life and how God never intended that I do that alone. Perhaps it isn't really an abuse of context since we are talking about [Christ's] body life. Particularly in the individualistic (can I just say selfish) society in which we live, it is so easy to forget or just plain ignore our need for each other; combine this with my human tendency to withdraw and isolate when problems are encountered, failures occur, etc. and I appreciate just how vulnerable I am!

The teaching series at church has been a great reminder. You may hear a series like that or else read a post like this one and just say, "I know that." But as Samuel Johnson said,

People need to be reminded more often than they need to be instructed.

Remind me (again) and I'll remind you. Bear one another's burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2)

what do you look like?

Norman Rockwell was still producing cover art for the Saturday Evening Post when I was born. Even so, I have no direct memories of those magazine covers, yet I grew up hearing about Rockwell and his works and being familiar with many of them at an early age. One of my favorites has always been the work entitled "Triple Self Portrait." I remember being quite entertained by the difference in the image in the mirror versus what was being painted on the canvas.

We all have an idea of what we look like. The physical is easily confirmed (or denied!) by looking into most any available mirror (whether to our delight or dismay is another matter.) Similarly, we all have an idea of what we look like in character--who we are--but discovering the reality is a bit more difficult than the physical, and it is generally much more sobering. The reality consists in how others perceive us; as I've gotten older, I've come to realize that frequently others view me very differently from how I think of myself.

One of the great joys for a Christian is the realization that God knew exactly the person each of us was, warts and all, when Jesus died on the cross to secure for us forgiveness of sins, to redeem us, and to reconcile us to himself. That is the realization of God's love for us. For you. "...while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8.) Common in the experience of Christians, however, is that as God grows us and teaches us, we more and more see ourselves as God does, and that is disheartening to say the least. We increasingly see that not only do we fall short of the glory of God, we understand more and more how far short we fall! I can get pretty dejected when I think about this.

That is in essence looking backward; our focus should be that God loves us. Lay hold of the truth put forth in Leighton Ford's comment,

God loves us the way we are but He loves us too much to leave us that way.

If you know Jesus as lord and savior, it is God who has begun to work in you and he will complete what he started. And that work is to conform you to the image of his son--not how he looks but who he is.

and how long will you be staying?

I spent much of last Saturday with my CD collection. I've been ripping my music down to MP3 format with plans to build a music server. This just adds fuel to the fire when my friends refer to me as a geek.

No matter. One of my favorite artists from way back is Gordon Lightfoot, and even though I like his earlier works best, I own one of his later CD's which is entitled "A Painter Passing Through." I had not thought about this disc for a long time but again encountered it this weekend.

I've always enjoyed meditating on that album title; I identified with it in a certain sense. A Painter Passing Through. I don't consider myself an artist of any kind, but I love to reflect on the notion that I'm passing through. I think of passages of scripture such as in Philippians 3, where Paul reminds us that we are "citizens of heaven." That notion, along with pondering Christ's return, helps me bear much frustration associated with living in this world.

Reflecting again on the Lightfoot album title, I was reminded of this quote:

The only ultimate disaster that can befall us, I have come to realize, is to feel ourselves at home here on earth.

—Malcolm Muggeridge

Live daily with the joy that this is not all there is! Even though I need to be diligent in my pursuits and the discharge of my responsibilities, and there are all kinds of frustrations that can derail me (if I let them,) those things just don't stack up against God's promise in Christ of eternal life with him. That is abundant life that begins anew every day.